9/12/19 – Journal Entry

7:08 AM

Right now I’m sitting barefoot outside on my yoga mat, under a tree. This is peace. This is what peace looks and feels like, I know it is. I’ve reached a state of serenity I’ve never experienced in my 21 years on this earth. I’ve fallen in love with the idea of creating the life I want to live and have been showing up every day to make it a reality.

As I sit here, watching the sun rise, I think of all the times I’ve wanted to give up and all the times I’ve tried to. I think of how if any of my suicide attempts had fallen through, I wouldn’t be experiencing this moment. I wouldn’t be alive to sit under this tree, sip my coffee, and watch the sun tell me good morning. I wouldn’t be alive to witness things getting better.

But I am. For some reason it wasn’t my time to die. I have a purpose.

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