The Art of Healing

For years, I thought that someday I’d eventually reach the point where I’m completely healed from everything I’ve ever experienced. Every heartbreak, loss, traumatic event, etc, would no longer hurt or bother me. I’d wake up each morning filled with joy and nothing that occurred in my past would ever trigger me again. Then, I connected with my last therapist who taught me that no one will ever be 100 percent healed. There will always be something that we are healing from. This shifted my perspective and the expectations I had of getting to a place in my journey where there was nothing left for me to recover from. 

The healing journey is neverending. The art of healing is both messy and beautiful. Along this journey, there will be many dark moments. Moments when your face is buried in a pillow to muffle your screams as you cry. Moments when you can’t see the light within the darkness. Moments when it feels like you’re completely losing your mind. But there will also be many joyful moments. Moments when the inner work you’re doing is radiating from you. Moments when you feel the sun beaming down on you, hear the birds singing, hear the wind whispering to the trees, and you know that you’re going to be ok. 

I remind myself at least once a day that I’m going to be ok because, for a while, I wasn’t sure that I would be. I’ve been on my healing journey for years and I’ll continue on this path in some form for the rest of my life. The traumatic breakup I went through in 2020 was such a pivotal moment for me because I realized up until the end of that relationship, I was never truly doing the work like I thought I was. I had so much baggage that I ran out of space in my closet. I realized I had two options: Continue on the self-destructive path I was on or embark on a journey toward healing. I chose the latter and I’m so grateful for it.

Healing isn’t linear and there’s no one way to go about it; however, there are some steps you can take to move you closer to your destination. 

6 Ways to Practice the Art of Healing

1. Acknowledge Your Wounds

Feeling is healing. You can’t heal something you’re avoiding or refusing to acknowledge. You may be placing temporary bandages on your wounds or suppressing your emotions. You may not even realize how badly you’re hurting until something triggers you. This is the first step to healing. 

2. Journal About Your Experiences

There is so much power in writing down your thoughts, feelings, and the things that go on in your life. Once you’ve acknowledged your wounds, it’s time to start working through them. I’ve been journaling since I was 5 or 6; it was my introduction to writing. I still have every journal I’ve ever written in. Journaling is one way I process situations and release my feelings. My journals have been my safe space when everything around me feels chaotic. When it feels like my world is crumbling around me, I turn to paper and pen.

Writing about your experiences can help you work through them and be a catalyst to healing.

Some benefits of journaling include:

• Helps you manage stressful situations
• Gives you space to process and release your thoughts and feelings
• Helps with achieving goals
• Inspires creativity
• Improves communication skills

3. Seek Support

We heal in community. We heal by having a solid support system. Seeking support may look like seeing a mental health professional or reaching out to your loved ones to share your struggles with them. Whichever way this looks for you, know that there are people in the world who are ready to love and show up for you.

In a recent therapy session, I realized that I sometimes struggle with being vulnerable and allowing others to support me. I’m always everyone else’s shoulder to cry on, but I tend to isolate or push others away when what I really need is help. Part of this is because I don’t want to be a burden, but my therapist quickly reminded me that others have no problem coming to me with their issues. On our healing journey, it’s ok to allow others to be there for us. 

4. Shadow Work

Shadow work is the process of working with our shadow selves or the dark or unknown side of ourselves. Coined by psychiatrist Carl Jung, our shadow self is the parts of ourselves we suppress or ignore. Shadow work is doing the inner work to heal from past trauma. Doing shadow work helps us understand every part of who we are. 

When you do shadow work, you’re dealing with the emotions you’ve repressed. You bring all these feelings to the surface and work through them. Shadow work is intense and can be uncomfortable.

Shadow work can be intimidating. You’re digging up things you were hoping to keep inside forever. You’re working through trauma that may have occurred years ago and to truly heal, this work is completely necessary. 

Getting to know your shadow self takes time, but you’ll learn to understand, forgive, and love all parts of yourself once you start. Shadow work allows you to understand certain behaviors and why you react to things the way you do. 

5. Engage in Activities That Bring You Joy

The other morning, I found myself dancing around the house to my favorite songs. It had been a while since I let loose and I felt the sadness lifting from my body. Movement is one of my favorite forms of healing. It’s important to know that healing doesn’t always have to be so heavy and intense, sometimes it’s engaging in activities that fulfill us and doing the things that make us happy. 

Commit to spending more time doing things that spark joy.

6. Practice Forgiveness

In another blog post, where I discussed the art of letting go, I touched on learning how to forgive and how difficult this has been for me. I’m someone who tends to hold on to people and situations longer than is healthy and it has only caused me to suffer. It takes me a while to get to a place where I can forgive someone. I realize that forgiveness is something we do for ourselves to release the heaviness of holding on from our hearts and minds. 

Choose Healing

On this journey, each of us has a choice. We can choose to continue dragging around all of our baggage, or we can decide to pack light. Healing isn’t an overnight process, but the quality of life you live once you choose that path is beautiful.

Acknowledge your pain and begin the process of working through and releasing it. Remember to practice self-compassion during this time and be gentle with yourself. 

Check out the other blog posts in this series:

The Art of Letting Go

The Art of Dating Yourself