If my depression wins and I take myself out,
I hope everyone knows how much they mean to me.
I’ve fought tirelessly for years and I think my time is near
I’m tired of being a healer because sometimes healers need healing
I need saving…
If I lose my battle with mental illness,
I don’t think anyone would miss me
I’ve been a burden most of my life
I’ve had over 10 suicide attempts and I just can’t figure out,
Why GOD keeps me here to torture me
GOD, can’t you see?
I need saving.
Saving from this hell on earth
Saving from the pain embedded in my heart strings
I paint a smile on my face most days and put on my cape
It’s time for me to save another life
But how can I?
How can I rescue everyone else while I’m dying inside myself
I place bandages on my open wounds and hope they don’t bleed through
I force my depression to keep quiet so I don’t disturb others
It’s time to save another life
It’s time for me to say goodbye
Sometimes the healer needs healing
GOD, please save me
Photo by Christina Deravedisian on Unsplash