11/28/20 – Poetry

Some days I hate myself.

I hate who I see when I stare in the mirror

I say to myself, “If I just lost a little weight, I’d love myself.”

I pick apart my flaws and I pray that by morning I’ll be pretty

Growing up I was deemed “the ugly sibling” and I’ve been scarred ever since

It doesn’t make sense that now I have so many people telling me I’m beautiful

And still… I hate my relflection

I want to look like her…

You know? The girls with the pretty teeth, clear skin and amazing figures

Some days I love myself.

I love who I see when I stare in the mirror

I say to myself, “You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”

I say my affirmations and I walk with my head held high

I realize, I don’t need to look like her

I stop picking apart my flaws

And those voices from my childhood are no longer relevant

Some days I want to change everything about myself and I’m learning that’s ok

I’m on a journey and at times it’s messy along the way

Whether I choose to change or stay the same, I’m learning to love who I am.

Photo by Jean-Karim Dangou on Unsplash

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